


keep it on the field

by onakissgodknows



Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: Angst and Porn, M/M, Not Beta Read, Rough Sex, Tumblr Prompt, as usual, this got out of control
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-16
Packaged: 2019-05-24 00:43:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14944425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onakissgodknows/pseuds/onakissgodknows
Summary: Carlos didn’t really think Troy would show up, but he does. They’ve barely spoken in six months, but Troy’s in Florida early for spring training and Carlos hasn’t left for Arizona yet, so Troy texts and Carlos answers and now Troy’s in his entryway.





	keep it on the field

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tulowhiskey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tulowhiskey/gifts).



> This is set in February of 2016 (spring training the year after Tulo got traded). It was written for the prompt "I never loved you," and I really didn't expect it to be this long but lol. Here we are. Let me know if I didn't tag something I should have.

Carlos didn’t really think Troy would show up, but he does. They’ve barely spoken in six months, but Troy’s in Florida early for spring training and Carlos hasn’t left for Arizona yet, so Troy texts and Carlos answers and now Troy’s in his entryway.

They barely even speak. They exchange pleasantries – _hi how are you how’ve you been_ – but the words are empty and they both know it, so Carlos grins wryly and puts a hand to the back of Troy’s head and kisses him.

It’s not a kiss as much as a fight, there’s no tenderness, no buildup before Troy’s pushing him against the wall and licking into his mouth and the air rushes out of Carlos’s lungs.

(Troy’s still mad, and why not? It’s months later but the wounds still have to be fresh, and he and Carlos both said things they didn’t mean and never apologized, so why shouldn’t Troy still be mad, why shouldn’t Carlos still be angry too?)

Troy drags him towards Carlos’s bedroom like he owns the place, and Carlos, irritated, tries to wrench himself away because he _doesn’t_. Carlos stumbles when Troy lets go and Troy doesn’t steady him, just kicks the door shut behind them. “Guess I should be glad you know what you invited me over for, huh?” Troy says. There’s a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth but it doesn’t reach his eyes.

“You invited yourself,” Carlos says, and it’s true, and he’s proud, in some twisted way, that Troy was the on who texted first. That was unspoken too, but it had almost started to feel like a contest, who could go longer without reaching out.

Of course, the other option is that Troy hadn’t thought of it that way at all, hadn’t cared, hasn’t even thought about Carlos in all this time.

Troy just shakes his head, eyes raking over Carlos’s body in an almost predatory manner. “Come here.”

He grabs Carlos’s face and kisses him again, not slowing down a bit, and Carlos immediately goes to work getting Troy’s belt open.

“Not even going to offer me a drink first?” Troy says against Carlos’s mouth, barely tearing his lips away. “Fast.”

Carlos pushes a hand down Troy’s pants and is unreasonably pleased when Troy lets out a choked-off gasp. “You never used to care.”

“Here I thought maybe you’d changed.” Troy shoves him away and yanks his own shirt off. “Shut up and get undressed.”

Carlos hates when Troy’s bossy for the hell of it and Troy knows that, but Carlos does what he says anyway. “Same old Tulo.” He’s not sure if he means it affectionately or not.

Troy’s smile is patronizing. “And you’re still CarGo.” His tone is the same as Carlos’s – part fondness, an awful lot of bitterness.

That’s okay. Carlos doesn’t care.

Troy fucks him like he’s still mad at him, hard and rough, putting a hand over Carlos’s mouth, so Carlos bites at his palm and Troy just pushes his fingers into his mouth, muttering “yeah, do that.” Carlos closes his eyes, sucking on Troy’s fingers like he’s giving his hand a blowjob, and all his senses are on fire in a way they only get around Troy.

Troy pushes his fingers a little too deep and Carlos feels his throat convulse and he elbows Troy hard in the ribs to make him – not _stop_ , but be gentler, even if it’s just a little. He feels rather than hears the air rush out of Troy’s lungs and how Troy pauses, winded, to catch his breath. He bites gently at Carlos’s ear and mutters something that might be apologetic.

But maybe not.

Troy rubs his fingers against Carlos’s lips again and Carlos parts them.

They’ve never been the type to take their time. Carlos thinks about every other time they’ve had sex, and it’s never particularly gentle or loving, and that’s fine. But this – this is different, Troy pushing him down on his stomach like he doesn’t want to look at his face, the lack of words exchanged, the way Troy’s practically gagging him – Carlos hates that he _likes_ it. He probably shouldn’t. He wonders if Troy’s thinking the same thing. Normally they can at least make each other laugh.

If Troy had only said he’s sorry – if Carlos could make himself apologize – they’re both way too stubborn, so all they get is this.

Troy scrapes his teeth down the back of Carlos’s neck and Carlos moans around Troy’s fingers, shuddering because it’s _almost_ too much.   

“Fuck, CarGo, that’s so fucking pretty,” Troy mutters, which is the nicest thing he’s said to Carlos in a long time - Carlos wishes he wasn’t thinking about it that way. Troy runs his tongue over the same spot, then bites down again and sucks. It hurts in the best possible way. Troy reaches around Carlos’s hips to grab his cock. Yeah, he’s really not trying to make this last, but quick and dirty is kind of their style.

“Ah, fuck.” Troy shoves Carlos harder down into the mattress as he comes. He thrusts into him a final time, hard, and that’s enough to set Carlos off, who bites down on Troy’s fingers so he doesn’t embarrass himself too much.

Troy slowly pulls his wet fingers out of Carlos’s mouth and wipes them on the side of his face. With a huff, Carlos scrubs at his cheek with the back of his hand. “Thanks,” he says irritably.

Troy laughs. “You’re welcome. Good for you, babe?”

Carlos gets to his feet, shaking his head. “Mature. Put your clothes back on.”

He splashes water on his face in the bathroom, cleaning up but also trying to knock some sense back into his head. Nothing about this feels like a good idea right now, and he’s starting to regret answering Troy’s text. He wonders if Troy regrets it.

When he comes back out, Troy’s dressed and lounging on the bed, staring at the ceiling. “I could use that drink you didn’t offer.”

Carlos almost tells him to fuck off, but something in Troy’s face stops him. He throws on a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. “There’s beer in the fridge. Come on.”

In the kitchen, Troy slouches into a chair, stretching out his long legs and looking morose. Carlos doesn’t ask. Troy takes a deep pull from the beer Carlos hands him and keeps staring off into space.

Carlos leans against the counter, sipping from his own bottle. “Little early to be down for spring training, isn’t it?”

“Plenty of work to do. Surprised you’re not in Arizona already.” Carlos can’t tell if Troy intended the bite behind his words, or if Carlos is hearing things that aren’t there.

Carlos frowns. “Have you….” It’s amazing how he has nothing at all to say to Troy anymore. “Have you spoken to Nolan at all?”

Troy looks at him now, eyes boring into his. “Why? Jealous?”

“No, Troy – “ Carlos cuts himself off, shaking his head. “It would mean a lot to him if you reached out. He was upset when you left.”

“When I _left_?” Troy clenches his jaw. “Like I had a choice, like I did it on purpose to upset you people? And what are you, talking about me behind my back with him? Don’t worry about it, CarGo.”

“No, we don’t talk about you,” Carlos snaps. “But it’s not hard to tell what he’s feeling.” Nolan’s an open book; he couldn’t hide his feelings if he tried. He’s the polar opposite of Troy, who plays everything so close to the chest Carlos isn’t sure he’s ever known what Troy’s really thinking.

Troy keeps looking at him for a few uncomfortable moments, then says, “I have, if it matters.”

“Have - ?”

“Reached out. To Nolan.” He sips his beer, still staring at Carlos like he expects some kind of reaction.

“Good.” Carlos means it. Nolan moped for a solid couple of weeks after the trade. Knowing that he and Troy are on good terms should be a relief. But then again –

It’s not surprising Troy likes Nolan better than he likes Carlos. It’s hard not to like Nolan, for one thing, and for another, Carlos has always known all too well how best to push Troy’s buttons. Troy’s the star. Troy’s the one the city loved, and Nolan seems his natural successor. Somewhere along the line, Carlos has always been shoved to the side in favor of something better. It’s like he’s got some pathetic form of little brother syndrome, just bubbling under the surface and waiting to boil over. He picks at Troy and Troy pushes him back.

But – fuck – doesn’t Carlos deserve better than this? Better than always existing in the shadow of someone greater than him? He’s poured his heart and soul into this team for the past seven years, and for all the articles and the analysts, the sports writers and the fans, to say the team has no future now that Tulowitzki is gone – it hurts.

But fine, then. Carlos will prove them wrong.

However, he’s touched a nerve with Troy now, and Troy doggedly continues. “It’s too bad, you know. That he’s stuck out there.”

_Don’t answer. Don’t let him get to you_. “What are you talking about?”

“Nolan in Colorado. Do you think he’s ever going to get what he deserves there? He’s too fucking good to be stuck in another losing season.” Troy sets his bottle down. “That’s why I’m glad I got traded, you know? So at least I have a chance.”

“You made the postseason twice with Colorado, I’m not sure you have room to complain,” Carlos says sharply.

“Not since 2009. Which you know. Don’t be stupid, CarGo, you know you’d get out of there if you could,” Troy says. He says it all so matter-of-factly, Carlos could almost believe he’s not being cruel on purpose. “You don’t have to fake appreciation for a city that’s never going to appreciate _you_.”

“Fuck you.”

Troy smiles. “Look,” he said placatingly, “you never know what’s going to happen. Maybe Colorado finally decides to rebuild. Maybe, come the trade deadline – I could always put in a good word for you with Toronto. They like me there.” His grin widens. “You and me, like the old days?”

Carlos wishes there was a chance Troy was being genuine, but there’s so much sourness between them now he thinks Troy just wants to watch him squirm. “I’ll pass, thanks,” he says coldly.

The smile fades from Troy’s face, leaving him with a stony expression. “I figured you might not know what to do with yourself with me gone. You don’t have anybody to get jealous of anymore.”

“Oh, shut up. As if you’ll do so well without me. You’ll have to find a new fuck buddy.”

Troy gets to his feet and goes to Carlos, puts his hands on his waist. “I mean, if today is anything to judge by, maybe I don’t.”

Carlos grins humorlessly and turns his face away when Troy moves like he’s going for a kiss. “Yeah, right. Maybe see you twice a year if you’re lucky. Your hand gonna get the job done the rest of the time?” He grabs Troy by the wrists and shoves him away. “But if they love you so much in Toronto, you probably won’t have much trouble.”

Troy stares at him. “Maybe you _are_ still jealous. What, afraid somebody else might love me?”

“I never loved you,” Carlos says, and it’s mean, it’s so fucking mean but he can’t help himself.

For half a second, it’s like the façade drops from Troy’s face and something – some wounded expression – passes over him. But Carlos probably imagined it because then Troy is as unreadable as ever, and he lets out a laugh. “CarGo, it’s sweet you thought that would hurt me. Really.” He laughs again, and it’s a strange, harsh laugh, and Carlos doesn’t think he’s actually amused at all. It’s just another example of this profound unkindness that exists between them, seeping into every word and every glance and everything they do.

Troy puts an arm around Carlos’s shoulders and kisses him on the side of the forehead. “We’re playing a series in Colorado this year. See you then?”

Carlos shrugs his arm off and steps away. “Maybe we keep it on the field.”

Troy laughs again. “Yeah, maybe. We’ll see.” He picks up his beer bottle and finishes off the last of it. “I should go. Thanks for the drink.” He gives Carlos’s shoulder a squeeze as he leaves the kitchen, and Carlos hears the front door slam behind him.

When he’s gone, it’s like he was never here at all.

**Author's Note:**

> I can be found on [tumblr](https://on-a-kiss-god-knows.tumblr.com/).


End file.
